


of all the things I wanted to say (it's better to leave some of them be)

by hackingxbiochemist



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Agentsofshield - Freeform, F/F, Femslash, Fic, femslashfebruary2017, shortfic, skimmons - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-24
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-09-26 14:48:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9906593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hackingxbiochemist/pseuds/hackingxbiochemist
Summary: a deeper look at one of the scene from 4x15, emphasizing in what Daisy feels.





	

**Author's Note:**

> So, this short fic is inspired from @bloodyquake post in tumblr, and as I promised, here’s a fic for you and all Skimmons shipper who feels alive after the scenes on 4x15. Enjoy! :) You can always asks me for prompt on Skimmons btw, find me at my tumblr @hackingxbiochemist.

There it was, before her eyes, the solution that might help them get out of there. Tanks and tanks of sleeping gas, she knows that it will be very useful, she wonders how much dose of the sleeping gas could knock everybody out. She sighs; everything is still a blur to her, what she just saw was completely absurd and insane. Her brain is working very hard in designing and escape plan, so they could get out safely. The amount of sleeping gas looks more than enough for her to knock out the whole building. She paces around the room, thinking as in how to disperse the gas, she is always not a big fan of chemistry. How lucky it is for her then, to get stuck in a room with a chemist, a brilliant one of course.

“We have sleeping gas! How many doses of that antidote are there?” Daisy stretches her arm at those sleeping gas tanks. Her eyes wide, turning back to Jemma, there might be hope for them, what matters most now for Daisy is getting them out to safety, it doesn’t matter if she fails, but Jemma should get out and Daisy will make sure of it.

Jemma just stare blankly at her, then she starts to hyperventilate, her eyes wide with panic and fear, her beautiful face is covered in bruise. “I don’t know,” Jemma says, her eyes are empty, she shakes her head frantically. “I can’t think without Fitz,” she turns her eyes away from Daisy, still shaking her head. Then Jemma slumps against the wall as she starts sobbing.

 _There it is, that name again._ Daisy can’t help but just to ignore the sting that always happened every time Jemma mentions Fitz. It’s not like Jemma is her girlfriend or what, Daisy had absolutely no right. Truthfully, her heart hurts, looking at Jemma this way, so fragile and hopeless. She would do _anything_ to take that away from Jemma, she did not deserve it. And now Daisy knows how to get them out of there, she got a plan.

“Simmons,” Daisy says, “Simmons, stay with me.” _No I can’t let Jemma crumbles, not here, Jemma can’t broke down, if she does, there’s no telling that I will be able to hold off my own feelings too._

“We can’t fight them, Daisy. It’s too much,” Jemma’s voice full of despair, her eyes are swollen from the tears she cried, “it’s all too much,” she continues, her eyes are brimming with tears.

Daisy moves toward Jemma, kneeling beside her, “Hey, hey,” she holds Jemma’s hand tightly. “Don’t worry about fighting them, okay?” her voice reassuring, she needs Jemma to know that she will protect Jemma, at any cost.

“I will,” Daisy states, her tone full of determination, she locks her eyes with Jemma. _I will take on them all for you, hell, I will take this base down with me if it means getting you safe._

“I will take on them myself,” she continues. _You don’t have to fight them; this is my job, to protect you._

Tears are starting to roll down Jemma’s eyes as she shakes her head, “No, Daisy, don’t do this,” her lips trembled as she squeezes Daisy’s hand. “You don’t have the gauntlets to protect your arms,” Jemma runs her fingers through Daisy’s arm, Jemma knows that Daisy’s arm is not a hundred percent healed yet, the bruises are still visible, and Jemma can’t let Daisy worsen her arm.

“It doesn’t matter,” Daisy takes a hold of Jemma’s hand, rubbing her thumb up and down Jemma’s hand, hoping to soothe her.

“Look, I know you still feel like you have to atone for Lincoln’s sacrifice,” Jemma speaks bitterly, “but sacrificing yourself is not the answer,” she grips Daisy’s arm, as if Daisy will fade away if she let go.

“That is not what this is about,” _No, Jemma, can’t you see, I’m trying to keep you safe, Lincoln is in the least of my mind, what matters most is you. Only you._

“I can’t lose you, too!” Jemma shouts, amidst their bantering, she snaps, she is tired of this, she is tired of almost losing Daisy, god knows how many times she feels this way and every time does not make the next time better, it is worse. She will not lose Daisy, she can’t lose her. Jemma starts sobbing again in between gasps of breath.

Daisy gasps, Jemma’s words freeze her brain, everything seems to suddenly pause. Her heart swells, and she feels like she can take on anything. She knows it is stupid to feel this way right now, but Jemma’s concern really touch her heart and that reminds her of the reason on why she needs to keep Jemma safe. “Look at me,” she grabs Jemma’s hand, “look at me,” staring deep into Jemma’s eyes.

“This is not a sacrifice play,” she shakes her head, assuring Jemma that she is not trying anything stupid. “You know why?”

Jemma stays quiet, tears are still rolling down her cheeks, Daisy puts her hand to Jemma’s cheek and wipes her tear as she says, “Because I will beat them. You hear me?” she smiles a little, confidence start growing on her. “I know it,” Daisy continues, her voice now a bit louder, her eyes are trying to tell Jemma that she cares about her.

“If for no other reason than this—through all the insane crap we have gone through, the one thing I’ve known,” Daisy pauses, “without a doubt, the whole time,” she speaks every word with certainty, “ _is that I love you and I care about you so much, Jemma,”_ … “is you and Fitz belong together,” she finishes her word as her voice falters a  bit.

Sometimes, what she wanted to say just comes out as what she needed to say, Daisy’s heart hurts a lot now, she tries not to break down, even though it feels like she is quaking herself inside, she can feel the ache through her chest. However, it is not worth it, Fitz is also her friend, a good one. It’s not fair for him, he went through a lot with Jemma and Daisy knows that Fitz really care about Jemma. Some part of her is screaming inside, she wants to be with Jemma, she is sure of it and she believes she can protect Jemma and give her the love she deserves. They have known each other for almost five years now and still, nobody can’t make her heart beats stronger than Jemma, no one ever makes her feel the same way as Jemma, not Ward, not Lincoln, they are not even close to make her feel what she always feel when she was with Jemma. On the other side Daisy knows that Jemma will also be devastated to choose between her and Fitz, Jemma is never a fan of choosing, and now Daisy is making that choice for her, she is trying to spare everybody’s feeling, and she just hope that as time goes by her heart can heal slowly. Then Daisy also remembers that maybe Jemma is better off with Fitz, that way, Jemma won’t be put to harm. Her deepest fear is getting Jemma into danger because of her, too many people she loved has died. It is true what people said about her, everywhere she goes, death follows. She doesn’t want that for Jemma, Jemma got a lot to live for and it is unfair if Daisy is being selfish, wanting Jemma for her but knowing that sooner or later Jemma might be put in harm’s way. In the end, she needs to let Jemma go, so she says the things needed to keep Jemma safe, not what she truly feels. Daisy wipes the tears from her eyes with her arm, it hurts like hell, but she knows that she won’t risk it for Jemma.

On hearing Daisy’s words, the tears that Jemma has been trying to keep inside falls out, and how her heart clenches at the last words Daisy said. Daisy cups her cheek again, wiping those tears on Jemma’s face.

“This is not how your story ends,” Daisy assures Jemma. _I won’t let it happen I swear._ “Okay?” Daisy exhales shakily, her hands trembling as she stands up, bracing herself as to what will she faces out there. Jemma’s face lit up at Daisy’s statement, looking at Daisy, ready to take on what’s going to come at her, Jemma feels a little warmth inside her that grows as she looks at Daisy, and that feeling, right there growing inside her, is hope.

**Author's Note:**

> Please comment! :)


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